Dealing With Toddler Tantrums

How can I deal with toddler tantrums?

Your toddler has passed the 12 months milestone or is at the age of 1.5 year, you might want to expect tantrums coming your way. It is totally fine, normal and usual so do not worry at all and read through the article that what can you do to deal with the tantrums.

But first and foremost I would really want you to know what NOT to do when your toddler is throwing a tantrum, so you can just STOP right there and then, if you find yourself doing one of these,

1.       Panicking:

Stop panicking if you are. I know it, and I feel you! It is very tough to deal with a tantrum specially when this is your first child. Every time he cries, you think something is wrong with him, or he is getting sick or he has some pain. But hey, this is just a developmental phase and toddlers tend to throw tantrums often, so you need not to panic at all.

2.       Yelling:

Don’t yell at your child. He is already having a bad emotional time and you don’t want to worsen it with a shout or yell at him. Also, many researches imply that yelling has very negative effects on a child’s personality that can stay with him for a life time

3.       Beating:

Beating your child is something that you never want to resort to. Corporal punishment in some countries is illegal whereas in some of the states people still resort to physical punishments. I believe that all of us as individuals, should understand the long-lasting negativity that ‘beating’ bears with your child. If you get frustrated or you think you’ll lose it all, then just take a deep breath, think that you are the elder one and you can deal with anything calmly.

4.       Giving in to toddler’s wish:

Giving in to your child’s unhealthy wishes just to keep them quiet is not a good idea. This can lead them to think that throwing tantrums would always get them whatever they want. Therefore, to avoid them expecting any good coming out of this screaming and throwing themselves against the floor, you should not give in to their wishes so easily.

5.       Ignoring the main cause:

As a mom, you know very well deep down your heart what went wrong. Yes I know it, and you know it too. :D So just do not ignore the underlying reason for your child’s tantrum. If he had an empty stomach for very long, or did not have a sound sleep, or he is trying to tell you something that happened but cannot interpret into words he may be very cranky because of that. So try to fix the reason behind that, not just give up with something temporarily like candies or things like that.

SO well, if you have come to terms with what I have suggested Not to do above, then you may know what to do while your child has a tantrum.

ü  Try to distract:

Distracting has been the number one game changer for me while dealing with toddler tantrums and trust me it is not at all difficult to do. For instance if your child is angry because he wants to go outside to play but it is not possible at the moment, so you just indulge them in something else, like for me painting and colouring did the job most of the time. So you can keep a track on what things your toddler likes to do and you can give them options to do something else other than what they are demanding.

ü  Keep him well fed and well rested:

Most tantrums and crankiness are usually an outcome of restlessness and empty tummy/ unorderly routine of mealtimes. So, it is important that you always take care of his sleep time and mealtime. And if you are planning to go out for a long drive or grocery shopping, be sure that you leave the house with a well fed and well rested baby, and keep a bottle of water, some snack and his favourite toy with you, so he would not be cranky the whole shopping time.

 ü  Make a bargain:

Sometimes, tantrums are not because of anger, hunger or restlessness, they might also be because your child wants to have some control on his life and not abide by everything that you want them to do. So in situations like that you can always make a bargain, for instance if your child doesn’t want to help picking up the pencils that he threw on the floor, and just go on and take out other toys before picking up the earlier mess, you may want to make a bargain here, like ‘come on, if you help me pick up all these pencils, then I will play water-gun with you.’ So this water gun thing is my son-number-two’s favourite and he would never decline that offer. You can also figure out your child’s favourites and make bargains about them.

ü  Wait out the tantrum:

Many a time tantrum are just a sudden emotional attack, that comes and goes on its own until you child figures out his way. At the toddler age, kids are usually developing emotionally so you can expect those emotional breakdowns once in every while. These kinds of tantrum can be just waited out, you only need to do is keep calm, and wait until the scene is over. But waiting doesn’t mean that you just leave your child alone; be with them, comfort them and make sure they realise that you are there for them.

  

ü  Physical Comforting/handling:

You can always comfort your child and tell them it is alright, by carrying them and giving a little hug. Sometimes, it may also happen that your child doesn’t want to be touched, carried or hugged because he is very angry and you fear that he would throw himself against the floor or may be just hurt himself in anyway, then you should hold them firmly, not hurting them but firm to an extent that they understand the nature of severity. My elder son would hit his head to the wall while having an anger tantrum, so I would hold him firmly and let him cry out his anger so at least he would not hurt his head. Now he is six years old and gets fascinated when I tell him his story.

  

ü  Be the listening ear:

Frustration of not being able to interpret the feeling or expressing the need is also a cause of anger tantrum, so to soothe your child, be kind and try to understand what they want to express. Most toddlers cannot speak very well until they are 3, so they can sometimes be frustrated because they want to say something, and you are not understanding. So, be the listening ear and understanding heart of your child. This would really soothe away the frustration that they have.

I hope this small article helps you while you are dealing with your toddler’s tantrum.